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When I Came Out with my Rape Story

When I Came Out with my Rape Story

When I shared my rape story and how I struggled with hypersexuality thereafter, so many men ridiculed me for indulging in sex quite late. They bragged about how they were already banging women by the time they were twenty and how I was so hard on myself.

The thing is, none would interpret it as me communicating pain. Because sex as a man is socially not something you overdo. Kinda like the more you do it the more you prove just how much of a man you are.

I wanted to discuss what my first sexual experience left me feeling. To elaborate how horribly meaningless sex became to me those initial years of my twenties after the rape. I wanted to know if there was anyone else out there like me. But no man was talking. No man was saying anything. I was almost meant to feel like something was wrong with me.

Now that I’m here today; more mature and knowledgeable on trauma and mental health; I’m reaching out to the men dying in silence, fearing ridicule by other men or society for speaking up about sexual abuse meted against them. This is your life and shit happened to you. Shit that demands acknowledgment and space to heal. Your people are out here willing to listen. Whatever pain you’ve been holding on to for years on end, it’s time to release it.

I have created a safe space you can join. We shall hold you. You are here and you belong.

Onyango Otieno

Onyango Otieno is a cultural designer ardent in maximizing the power of storytelling for healing and connection. Onyango believes in the potent spirit of humanity collectively creating safe spaces for interaction, development, business and movement, for a more cohesive world.

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